Nazzoura's birth.

On tuesday (the day before) I was teaching piano in Halba for half a day. I was feeling that the labor was close, so I asked Maher to drive me home. In the evening kids went to sleep early, and we sat outside with Nada guessing the constellations and telling jokes. It was around midnight when the contractions started getting stronger and I started seeing some blood. We got excited and waited till 2 o'clock but they didn't get any stronger, so we decided to sleep. Surprisingly, I could sleep well between contractions and around 6 in the morning, Maher tried to call the midwife but noone answered. He called Taghrid to see if she has another number of her, but Taghrid said she didn't. An hour later Taghrid came to see how I was doing and while chatting with her contractions stopped all together. Some time later Maher could get the midwife (at last) and she said to call her when the contractions will get 5 minutes apart. She told me to walk. Taghrid left and I started walking, half an hour later they got 5 minutes apart and really painful. Maher called the midwife again and she said she was coming. I was a little nervous about her arrival, cause up until then everything was so perfect and simple, I was really afraid she will spoil the atmosphere. But catching the baby alone seemed also scary, especially that Petra when born didn't scream, she only did when the midwife tapped her on her back. Anyway, Taghrid came again some time later and we could chat and joke between contractions, however I really needed to concentrate to get through them at that stage. Midwife arrived an hour later, checked me and said I was 10 cm dilated! I could not believe that! She said if I push a baby will be born in an hour. I was so excited! She suggested I try different positions for pushing and tell her which one I think is the best so she can adjust to catch the baby. It was her first time to deliver someone not on her back, and I really appreciate that she was willing to try. She even encouraged me to keep changing positions. But it seemed no matter what position I take, my legs hurt to the point that I could not concentrate on pushing. At last she suggested I sit with my back against the wall and try pushing. It was so nice to relax my legs! However in that positions my contractions started getting weak and stopped all together. It was a disappointment but at the same time we decided I take some rest, so we sat chatting for around an hour with almost nothing happening.

It was a nice chat with her, she was telling us of her experience in the hospital as a midwife, how doctors cheat and put every other woman to C-section with no need, told us sad stories with all the unnecessary interventions ending up in a drama. After an hour she told me that I should start making some progress, and suggested I start walking again. Walking and squatting brought again some strong contractions, but I was spoiled by that sitting position, so that every time I got tired I sit down to rest and contractions would stop..:) She checked me and said that the baby was coming down really slowly so to speed things up she suggested I lie on my left side. It was like magic! But when I thought I could not take the pain anymore and wanted to sit she said "try to push with them". I tried pushing and it took off some pain but after some time i started crying that I can not do it anymore. She told me to sit down again, but promised rest did not come and contractions only got stronger. Maher sat behind me and leaning against him made things a little easier.

I kept pushing like that for another hour, crying and screaming that I will never do that again, this is my last baby, I can never push him out and asking the midwife to check me constantly to see if the baby was moving down. She was really calm all the time, joking sometimes and sometimes asking me to pray instead of crying, reassuring me all the time that I was doing good and the baby WAS coming down. I decided to start praying. Suddenly it occured to me that feeling like I could never do that won't help neither me nor the baby, I gathered my last strenght and said outloud I CAN push this baby out! And with Maher's and midwife's encouragement I could feel baby's head coming out! I remember the midwife looked at me and said "half of his face is out, you should get him out with the next contraction or he could suffocate!" I pushed as much as I could with the next contraction the only thought was on my mind "I might die pushing but he will not suffocate". While his head was coming out, the midwife told me to breath and not push so that I won't tear, and then she ordered last time "push!" and he was out! We just cried of joy! I could not believe it! She gave me my precious baby boy and I started kissing him all over. I didn't want to nurse him I just wanted to hug him and kiss him..:) We felt so overwhelmed by the whole experience. Midwife wanted to bath him but I asked for some time more. Im Ilias came (we kicked her out when she came before and wanted to see birth :) and Nada came from work and was shocked to see the baby in my hands. Everything seemed so perfect. We laughed and chatted for some time. Nazzoura still didn't nurse, he just lay down beside me looking peacefully around him. It was the best birth ever!